 n the summer of 2008, my loving cousin Margie shared a dream she had with me. In her dream, she said I bore a gorgeous son. Due to past experiences I have learned not to listen to folks and their so called visions, but I trusted Margie and claimed this blessing. Surprisingly, in the fall of 2008 my doctors confirmed that I was pregnant!!! Words could not explain how Ike and I felt about this good news. My prayers were answered. My son was born in the spring of 2009 and we named him Keneolisa, which means Praise God in Igbo; a language from East Nigeria, West Africa. A long time ago I made a promise to God, that if he kept me alive to see my children I will share my testimony proclaiming His name and blessings. Today, I fulfill that promise……………..
My article is neither a sermon, nor an attempt to preach either. I acknowledge that the world is filled with different religious beliefs and we serve different supreme beings. The Supreme Being I serve is God. Hopefully, my message will reach out to anyone going through a difficult storm regardless of how we differ in religious beliefs.
If you knew me 15 years ago and someone told you that I would be where I am today, you would have laughed and said it was impossible. To be honest, I didn’t know how far I would go without my parents around to support me. From the day I was thrust into a world of pain and agony I couldn’t see the light at the end of the tunnel. All I had going on for me was my determination to succeed and prove people wrong, that even an orphan can succeed in a cruel world. In my naivety, I thought I could do everything by my might without any help. In the physical, yes I accomplished a lot with hard work and perseverance but in my soul I still suffered. Nothing seemed to end the sadness I felt even with the simplest accomplishments. It seemed the harder I worked the stress took a toll on my body. The stress gave me alopecia areata and horrendous adult acne. I was searching for peace within and couldn’t get it from anything or anyone. The absence of my parents made things worse because I didn’t know who to turn to in my desperate times. No matter how obedient or rebellious I was to an elder, nobody could love me or forgive me like their own child. It took me a while to grasp that I’ve been trying to replace my parents subconsciously but I see clearly now and understand that nobody can replace my loving parents.
It took me a while to grasp that I’ve been trying to replace my parents subconsciously but I see clearly now and understand that nobody can replace my loving parents.
The feeling of emptiness went on for a very long time and I made some bad judgments because I didn’t know how to deal with my unexplainable issues. For some reason, each time I fell from grace, I kept getting back up without shame or defeat. I was supposed to go through that storm to find God on my own. I found that the reason I kept rising above my mistakes was because God was making a new path for my destiny. He never left my side. Though I didn’t fully acknowledge Him, I felt His hand in every aspect of my life. When I finally claimed Him, everything changed. It was like the shackles of pain had been released from my soul and I was floating in the invisible bosom of my Almighty Father. Yes, I had been set free! Letting go and allowing God to do His work in my life has given me peace and strengthened my faith. I am no longer driven by pain or anger and I do not have to struggle as much anymore to solve my problems, I leave it all Him!
I am a witness to the blessings of my Father and I want to share the one experience that touched me the most. At age 29, I found out that I had uterine fibroids. This is really not a big deal now because it is operable. Nonetheless, I didn’t take my condition for granted. I had two procedures done; a myomectomy and a laparoscopy. Both surgeries were a success but also a cause of celebration. I remember the look on my doctor’s face when he walked into my room to discuss the surgeries, he looked at me and said “Ngoma, God must love you.” Apparently, my doctor underestimated the size of my fibroids. He actually took pictures to show me what was removed from my uterus. There were three huge growths the size of a three month old fetus and three additional smalls ones the size of a table tennis ball. I cried profusely because at that moment I knew God had delivered me from harm. I look at those pictures very often as a reminder of my blessings.
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